Hop Review

Cute but not cuddly......Hop

Like the Easter special of Alvin and The Chipmunks, this adorable seasoned movie is set up with all the usual cliches. The Easter Bunny is always a bunny and the 'Easter Factory' is on Easter Island inside one of the Moai's. Octopus-like Russell Brand stars in this themed-movie based on one bunny about to inherit the Easter Bunny title. So he runs away to Hollywood, where all stars go from rags to riches. 'That lady who wrote Harry Potter, wrote it in a ditch' was one of the unfunny quotes the film sprouts. James Marsden plays your twenty-something slacker, who gets chucked out of his house because he doesn't have a job. Instead of picking a real actor who is 20-ish, they chose Marsden who is 37. Eventually they meet but have to save the day from the evil Bunny, Carlos (voiced by Hank Azaria) who plans to overthrow the Bunny Empire. With one or two funny moments, this film is a bad movie dusted with sugar and spice. 


2.5/5

The Eagle Review

Battle to the north.......Channing Tatum in The Eagle

Based upon Rosemary Sutcliff's 1954 novel The Eagle of The Ninth. It stars Channing Tatum as    Marcus Aquila, who comes to South Britain to put his family's good name in order. After he disappeared into the mists of Northern Britain with the Ninth Legion. He is injured in battle and goes to stay with his uncle (Donald Sutherland) where he spares the life of a slave Esca (Jamie Bell). They decide to travel north of Hadrian's Wall (separating the north and south of Britain) to search for the missing Eagle standard that was lost when Marcus's father and the NInth vanished. It's good storytelling but becomes a bit of a bromance and a Batman and Robin friendship ensues. I would watch it again and it's a solid film that has a strong influence of Ridley Scott's Gladiator. 


4/5

I Am Number Four Review

I Am Number Bore.........Alex Pettyfer and Dianna Agron

Too long, too bright and too bad a movie. I Am Number Four stars Wild Child and Stormbreaker star Alex Pettyfer as a alien child in human form. The resemblance to Twilight is uncanny and the bad guys' look like Eric Bana's Nero in the 2009 Star Trek mixed with Ralph Fiennes' Voldemort. Glee's Dianna Agron is our girlfriend and Timothy Olymphant is our super-powered Dad. This film has soon light touches and is very entertaining. It all gets complicated and a Australian Teresa Palmer enters the spotlight with a motorbike and flashy guns. This film gives you loads of silly bits and the chemistry between Pettyfer and Agron is stupid but not a bad film.


2/5

Gnomeo and Juliet Review

Welcome to the garden, we got the fun and games.....Gnomeo and Juliet

When someone told me that there was a film called Gnomeo and Juliet coming out, "like Romeo and Juliet, but with gnomes." I laughed and thought it was a bad joke but it wasn't. It was what Elton John has been doing for the past ten years except opening a clothes shop and having a baby. He sees a new humorous children's animation as gnomes. Yes, kids get a few laughs when they see the bus adverts, 'pain in the grass' and 'a little adventure goes a lawn way' but this film wastes it's decent jokes on the trailer. Ruining this perfect little kid's flick. Apart from some dire gnome jokes ("holy matrognomey"), ear-splitting Elton John songs and Sir Patrick Stewart playing Shakespeare, it isn't half bad. With a A-list cast, Jason Statham, Maggie Smith, Michael Caine and Julie Walters, it comes out not half bad with the surnames of the humans (Montague and Capulet, those were the surnames in Shakespeares' Romeo and Juliet.) It's an enjoyable kid's film that goes a long way.


3.5/5 

Rango Review

One cool chameleon............Rango

This film has cliches and parodies mixed into one. It takes the mickey out of old Western movies and really makes you want to see one of the old Clint Eastwood movies. It shows domestic chameleon, who at first is unnamed, recreating a scene with a wind up fish, a dead fly, and a headless mannequin. One thing leads to another and the chameleon has reached the town of Dirt. After making a few friends, Beans (Isla Fisher) and enemies, Mayor John (Ned Beatty, who's character is very similar to Lot So Huggin' Bear in Toy Story 3), Rango fits in difficultly into this desert(ed) town. Water supplies have lowered and it's up to Rango and a few desert animals to solve the mystery of the missing water. One highlight of mine, is Timothy Olyphant mocking Clint Eastwood as 'The Spirit of the West'. Good stuff and I would highly recommend it. 


4/5

Tangled 3D Review

Fairy tale frolics

Since the dawn of 3D film making, varied films have been constructed round this new dimension. With "eye-popping" effects and jump out of the screen graphics. Now Disney, Dreamworks, Pixar and other cartoon 3D creators have transformed every film into 3D with no effects. In some cases this as been effective but it doesn't have any impact on the film.               Tangled has that going for it. Another Formula-A film generated as Disney's 50th motion picture. Way back in 1937, we have a straight-out-of-the book Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs. But that changed animation forever. Meet Rapunzel  (Mandy Moore) who is kidnapped as an infant and raised by the not-so-scary Mother Gothel (yes that's right) (Donna Murphy). It's a musical that sees "Blondie" turn 18 and set out with Flynn Rider (Zachary Levi) to see the "floating lights" and be reunited with her parents. A harmless, Disney flick, cut out for a stage production. 

3/5

Tron Legacy 3D Review

Neon lights and a clunky plot.....Tron: Legacy

Have you ever experienced the feeling where you cry and water gets in your eyes so all primary colours go blurry and it's hard to make out things. All you can see is blurs.The special effects of "Tron 2" is similar. Very much like the fight sequences in the Transformers film saga. Those bright shiny Lycra suits that the cast have to wear look like freak offspring of a neon light sign and Iron Man. A small paragraph at the beginning details that the film was shot in 2D and dubbed in 3D. At times I flipped off my 3D specs and saw that there was no 3D blur just normality. Another con for your money. Tron: Legacy sees Jeff Bridges, who has been carefully preserved in the heart of Hollywood for this event disappear leaving his small son Sam, alone. One thing leads to another and we get a evil Jeff Bridges, one trapped person in a computer game and a load of dire effects. You choose either you go or you don't.

4/5